Need Some Comic Relief? READ MOAR SPAM!!

I was stopped in my mouse tracks the other day while attempting to achieve Inbox Zero for a certain client’s stack of e-mail tickets. I received a spam email message that was so bad, it was good. I really got a lift out of it. I’m going to reproduce it here in case there is a poor, languishing IT worker that needs a chuckle. Any search engine hatred I get for reproducing a spam message will be well worth it.

The piercing comedy comes from the fact that this spam message does not seem to be simply packed with pseudo language to skirt around spam filters. It appears to be a legitimate attempt at ensnaring new customers for a cut-rate web hosting service in… shall we say… a certain Cyrillic-using Eastern European country. Also, the entire message was in 24 point Times New Roman, blue and underlined.

To whomever crafted this treasure of the English language (or whoever ran it sideways through a Slavic -> Huli -> Ewok -> English -> Chinese -> Inuit -> English translator), I shower you with virtual rose petals. You, dear ones, are my heroes for the day.

Welcome to e… !

We also provide services DDoS’a!

Every day our world is moving forward, walking in the footsteps of new technologies. With the development of the Internet and poyavlyaniem any electronic goods, and hence the electronic money. Currently, the volume of transactions on the Internet billions of U.S. dollars. And always someone with someone else is paying.

On our site you will be able to make the exchange of electronic money on the most favorable rate. We work with the most popular and liquid electronic payment systems of the world, including Liberty Reserve, Perfect Money, Liqpay and others.

Why are you with us advantageous?

The answer to this question is most important in the exchange – Safety and course. In two of these parameters, we offer you the best possible terms. Currency exchange rates in our exchange points are the lowest in the world. If you find a more profitable course of our – immediately vsyazhites with us and we will make the course even better! Our site is a business card – we do not ask, so do not keep data about you and your accounts. The transaction goes online (communicating with the operator), so both you and us are not afraid of break-ins.

Electronic Payment Systems

In the world there are many electronic payment systems. There is a very popular system, and there is less. Each system is different committees, the level of safety, liquidity, market and policy development on the Internet. Therefore, we only work with payment systems that allow their customers to easily make transfers in combination with high safety. Of the banks, we chose the largest and most reliable – Privatbank with his payment system Liqpay.

Constantly we are exploring e-commerce market and add areas of exchange of money online.

Sincerely Administration …


Email # 1: e… @

Email # 2: e… @

Skype: e…

ICQ: 6…390


 The Takeaways

First, providing your customers with DDoSs is a selling point.

Second, “poyavlyaniem” isn’t a word, but it should be. So now it is. I think it means “Refunds will be paid in borscht.”

Third, seriously, why are you with us advantageous?

Fourth, the largest and most reliable bank is Privatbank with his payment system Liqpay

I hope you all learned something from this.

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